Are you Equiunted with the spicy?

The Russian consulate in New York is an interesting place. Primarily in that visiting the consulate is like visiting Russia itself. I guess that makes sense since it's theoretically Russian territory, but I'd appreciate an attempt to accomodate those who might visit said consulate. For instance: signs posted in the embassy and instructions on what to do to get a visa should be posted in English--gramatically correct English while we're at it. When visiting the consulate, instructions posted on the big, not-so-inviting oak door were written in Russian only. The only thing I could make out on the sign were some times that the consulate was open, with days of the week (Thank you!). Finally, I make my way into the visa section and I see a sign out of the corner on my eye:

• To get Equiunted with visa information...

Equiunited. Pardon? Do they actually mean acquainted? I know that many immigrants don't speak English perfectly (ok, many in NY don't even speak any English at all), but can't they at least try to be a little more professional? For that matter, have you ever walked into an immigrant store or restaurant?

My favorite from a Chinese restaurant here in the city:

• We can change spicy to suite your taste.

Restaurant and other shops need to up the professionalism a little bit and get a fluent English person to write their signs and menus. It's really not that hard and if there really is no one in the whole of NY that would do it for them, I'll do it for them. Since all the hole-in-the-wall Chinese restaurants have the same exact menu, I feel I could really have a widespread influence as a Chinese menu grammar corrector. More about Chinese restaurants later.